Dr Death & Detective Sexy McBadass
by Salem Navy
Summary: "You were supposed to wear a costume, Jane." The dynamic duo attend a Halloween party at the Dirty Robber before deciding to take a trip inside the haunted house. And then a little bit of smut ensues. My first attempt at Rizzles... SO BE KIND. One-shot.


**Title: Dr. Death & Detective Sexy McBadass**

**Author: Salem Navy**

**Pairing: Jane Rizzoli and Maura Isles**

**Rating: M **

**_I know it's almost Thanksgiving, but it took me forever to write this and I still wanted to post it anyway. It's my first attempt at Rizzles fanfiction so be warned. It's totally pointless drabble with a little smut at the end (that didn't end up being as long and drawn out as I'd planned, but whatevs)... so if that's not your thing, I suggest you back away slowly and go read something else. _  
**

**_Reviews are greatly appreciated as always (but flames are not)! XOXOX_**

* * *

Jane stood outside Maura's front door, feeling utterly ridiculous, as she contemplated whether or not she should go inside. On one hand, she was freezing—skintight leather did nothing to block out the cold October air of Boston—and she knew that the M.E.'s home would provide the warmth she craved. But on the other hand, that would mean having to be seen in this get-up and that was something the detective was currently still undecided on. If she left now, she could always tell Maura that she'd come down with some kind of illness or that she couldn't find something suitable to wear or that she'd tripped over Jo Friday and sprained her ankle.

She was still deliberating on which excuse to use as she turned from the door to begin the short trek back to her car. Unfortunately, she was immediately halted in her tracks as she heard the door to the doctor's house open. _Well, fuck. So much for talking your way out of this one, Rizzoli._

"Maur, hey!" Jane said, a little too enthusiastically as she spun back around; only to furrow her brows upon seeing her best friend's dress. "You've got to be kidding."

Maura frowned as she leaned against the door, tilting her head to the side as she examined the detective. "You were supposed to wear a costume, Jane."

The brunette threw her hands up in the air in exasperation. "What does this look like? It's definitely not part of my normal attire," she scoffed before squeezing past Maura, whose costume managed to take up almost the entire entryway, before retreating to the kitchen to snag a beer out of the honey-blonde's fridge.

"Of course it isn't, Jane. That would be in no way appropriate for the office and I highly doubt you would be able to catch a perpetrator in such restrictive clothing."

Maura struggled to turn around and follow her friend as she lifted up the many layers of her dress before closing the door. Perhaps she hadn't fully considered the ramifications of such an elaborate Halloween ensemble. Regrettably, she hadn't taken the time to prepare a proper back-up costume—because she truly had expected this one to be a hit—and now she was going to be waddling around the Dirty Robber all night, suffocating in the mass of people as she battled her way back and forth to the bar.

She paused her thoughts momentarily, considering the possibility of sitting at a table all evening, sipping her drinks through a straw as she watched others mill about. Of course, Jane would more than likely have to bring her drinks to her since there was no way she could make her way through the sea of patrons multiple times throughout the night. While the idea of not fully being able to enjoy the festivities dampened her spirits a little, she did smirk when imagining the sway of Jane's hips in the short black leather skirt as she'd strut towards the bar.

The M.E. felt her skin flush immediately at the thought and she took a few deep breaths, not wanting to overheat any more than she already was in the many layers of her dress.

"Are you feeling alright?" Jane questioned as she chugged down the remnants of her beer before tossing it in Maura's recycling bin and walking over to stand in front of her best friend.

"Yes… no," the doctor corrected, not needing to start hyperventilating or breaking out in hives on top of everything else. "I just… it's rather unfortunate that I hadn't considered the complications of going to a party in such an extravagant costume. I can barely move with this petticoat and farthingale underneath, and I must admit that the corset is making breathing rather difficult at the moment."

Jane tried to hide her grin as she took another moment to look over Maura's appearance. She certainly didn't want the ME to think she was amused at her discomfort, but she was unable to contain the slight snicker that escaped.

"Are you laughing at me?"

"No… well, yes. But not for the reasons you're thinking," the detective explained, knowing that her best friend could be very sensitive at times. "It's just that, I don't even know who you're supposed to be." Jane smiled apologetically before patting the top of Maura's ostentatious red wig. "Lucille Ball?"

"Jane," Maura said sternly. Of course, it took only a confused face from Jane before the doctor was unable to hold back her own laughter, simultaneously shaking her head at the brunette. "I am Queen Elizabeth the first, if you must know. However, upon recent insight, I am honestly rethinking my hasty choice. I was just so excited at the idea of getting to wear such an ornate ensemble. The Queen's gowns were hand embroidered with a multitude of colored threads and decorated with diamonds, rubies and even sapphires. While obviously, my own costume isn't authentic since I don't find the idea of wearing real jewels practical when attending an event of this nature, but I did spend much time researching and I even have many of the accessories she would carry in order to remain as historically accurate as possible. Were you aware that the Queen wore the first known wrist watch in England, given to her by Robert Dudley, the Earl of Leicester? She was an extremely fascinating woman, Jane."

"Wow. She definitely sounds mesmerizing," the detective said sardonically, knowing that Maura would miss the sarcasm in her voice. "And as wonderful as Queen Fancy-Pants is, we're going to be very late if we don't get a move on."

"I can't go like this!" Maura gasped, wondering if Jane had missed the entire point of her rather drawn out explanation. "I won't be able to move once we get inside the Robber."

"Ugh, Maur. Really? Can't you just take off a few skirt-things and loosen up the vice grip on your chest there and remove some of your _jewels_ so we can get a move on? I hate being the last to show up. Plus, I'd really like to sneak in with a crowd so I'm less likely to get noticed in… well, _this_," she said, pointing to her leather-clad body.

"For starters, there is no way you are going to go unnoticed this evening. You are gorgeous, my friend. Secondly, if I remove everything you suggested, I will lose the authenticity of the entire outfit. How would anyone recognize who I am portraying?"

"You're absolutely right, Maura. No one will realize that you're _The Queen_," Jane emphasized the title using air quotes, "if you don't wear that ridiculous petticoat. Can we please just figure out a solution to your little problem within the next 15 minutes at least? Please."

"We need a solution for you as well."

"What are you talking about?"

"You're dressed as a detective, Jane."

"The package this came in said _cop_, for your information. They're completely different," the brunette insisted. "Besides, we don't have time to worry about both of our costumes. It's going to take half an hour alone to get you out of that death trap."

Maura simply rolled her eyes before attempting to pick up handfuls of her skirt and walk to her bedroom. "If you're done being disdainful, I do believe I have a resolution to both of our dilemmas."

Jane sighed dramatically before trudging to the kitchen to grab another beer and grumbling, "I was not being disdainful."

She was still mumbling about the ridiculousness of Halloween by the time she'd made her way to Maura's bedroom. The brunette gasped at what she saw causing her to choke on some of the beer she was guzzling down. A practically nude Maura Isles stood in front of her, wearing only a corset and a pair of very revealing panties.

"Jane, are you alright?" Maura asked her voice full of concern, as she took a few steps towards her best friend.

It was then that the detective noticed that Maura was still wearing a pair of 'fuck me' pumps, which paired with the rest of the ensemble, was likely to make Jane spontaneously combust. _Focus, Rizzoli. Just fucking focus. _"Yeah, yeah," she wheezed. "It just went down the wrong tube."

"Your epiglottis must have…"

"Listen, talking Google, we don't really have time for an anatomy lesson right now. Just tell me about this idea you have and for the love of God, can you please put some clothes on?"

Maura rolled her eyes before grabbing her robe off the door and slipping it on, smirking. "You have seen me in far less clothing, Jane."

"Yeah, well… just… what's your plan, Doctor Smartypants?"

"How would you feel about wearing these?" the honey-blonde questioned, holding up a light green outfit she pulled from her closet.

"That's so boring, Maura. I want to be something cool."

"Well, I do have some fake blood and a few other typically grotesque accessories that can be added on to make the costume a little more interesting."

"Fine. Whatever you say," Jane sighed, feeling slightly relieved that she wouldn't be walking into the party in a black leather skirt and what many would consider 'hooker' boots. "But wait, what are you going to wear?"

* * *

Korsak nearly choked on his beer as he saw Jane and Maura enter the Dirty Robber. "Would ya get a look at Dr. Isles," he stammered, nudging Frost's shoulder.

The younger detective turned his head, following Korsak's pointed finger before laying eyes on the doc. He quickly closed his mouth, not wanting to drool all over the table, as he attempted not to ogle Maura; or Jane for that matter—because she'd have no second thoughts about removing his manhood if she caught him staring.

"Hello Barry, Vince," Maura smiled as she and Jane approached the detectives. "I hope we haven't arrived too late. Jane and I had a bit of a SNAFU regarding costumes."

"You know what SNAFU means?" Jane questioned, raising a slightly stunned eyebrow at her best friend.

"Why of course I do, Jane. It's a colloquial term often used by members of various military forces. It means that a situation is bad or serious, but that it's a normal state of affairs. They often use it in more of a joking manner to describe something that is working as intended…"

The three detectives just shook their heads before letting out amused chuckles. Maura had no idea how positively adorable she could be when she started spouting off information as if she was reading it straight from Encyclopedia Britannica.

"So who are you two supposed to be?" Jane asked Frost and Korsak, cutting Maura off mid-ramble by placing a gentle hand on the doctor's forearm.

"I'm Larry," Frost announced, "and he's Curly." He pointed his thumb at a bald Korsak. "Your brother, Mo, is running around here somewhere."

"You all really decided to come as the Three Stooges? That's absolutely… precious," Jane mocked.

"It's no different than you and Dr. Isles pulling a Freaky Friday over here," Korsak pointed out.

"Actually," Maura stepped in, "this was entirely unintentional. I assure you."

Jane hadn't really thought about it until now, but it did appear as if she and Maura had attempted to dress up as overdramatized versions of each other.

Back at the house, Jane had slipped into a pair of old scrubs before allowing Maura to cut a jagged edge along the top that exposed most of her midriff. One pant leg was tattered and torn while the other was riddled with holes. After that was over, the honey-blonde covered her hands in fake blood before leaving handprints all over Jane's body. The detective shivered, remembering what it had felt like to have the M.E.'s small hand pressed against her ribcage, just under her breast. What she wouldn't give to have those same hands touching every inch of her naked body.

"Jane? Hello! Earth to Jane!" Frankie shouted, snapping his fingers in front of his sister's face as he approached.

"What are you… quit that shit," Jane said, pushing Frankie's hand away from her.

"Jane, language," Maura scolded, frowning slightly at her best friend. "Spencer Kimball once said that profanity is the attempt of a weak mind to express itself forcefully."

"Did you just call me weak minded?"

"No. Of course not, Jane. I find you to be a highly intelligent individual," Maura flustered. "I was simply quoting a well-known religious leader."

"Actually, I'm pretty sure you just called me stupid." The detective tried not to take offense from Maura's statement, knowing that the M.E. was often unaware of how her words could be taken, but she was currently feeling slightly on edge after being caught zoning out by her younger brother.

"But Jane… no, I just…"

"So Maura, I'm really digging your costume," Frankie stated, interrupting the honey-blonde's stammering in hopes of preventing an argument between the two women.

The doctor blushed suddenly, feeling all eyes turn to her. While never one to be shy, she had worried somewhat before leaving the house that the costume would be too revealing for a party with co-workers. While the costume was perfectly suited for Jane's athletic figure, Maura's curves were overly accentuated; with her chest basically on full display. The leather skirt hugged her hips perfectly, but she was well aware that more than one of her assets could essentially pop out at any time.

"Thank you, Frankie," she stammered, suddenly remembering her manners.

"You should have seen what she was planning on wearing before," Jane said with a smirk. "It would've blown you away." She winked at her best friend before excusing herself to go to the bar.

She really needed to get away from Maura right now because, in all honesty, seeing her best friend in a skintight leather top that couldn't quite zip all the way due to Maura's boobs currently being pushed up to her ears, was really starting to get Jane flustered; as in, all the blood in her body was beginning to head south.

"I need a stiff one," the detective sighed as she leaned against the bar, motioning for Murray.

"I'm pretty sure that's what she said," Maura smiled, followed by a delighted giggle as she came up behind Jane. She was surprisingly proud of herself for having made a relevant joke and grinned even more when she saw the twinkle return to Jane's eye. "I thought you would find that comment pleasing."

"Very much so, Doctor Isles."

"Actually, I'm a detective. Couldn't you tell by my costume?" She turned to lean seductively against the bar, making sure Jane had a full view of her well-endowed bosom. Maura had certainly perceived the way the brunette had been eyeing her all night; and while the costume was awfully revealing for someone of her stature, she liked that it gave Jane the chance to admire her more fully.

Gulping down her beer, Jane tried to keep her eyes trained on Maura's face instead of obviously staring at her breasts. "You're a cop. Not a detective," she stated huskily, noticing the arousal that had ultimately slipped into her voice.

The M.E. watched as Jane's brown eyes grew darker; her breathing quickly becoming more labored as she attempted not to stare at the honey-blonde's practically visible rack. Maura felt her own knees growing weak upon seeing the predatory stare Jane had fixed her with. _Well, I'd say that escalated rather quickly._

"Hey Jane!" Frost shouted as he ran towards the pair, snapping them from the hormone induced trance they'd found themselves caught up in. "We were about to head into the haunted house that Murray had put together. What do you say… are you down?" He stood there for a moment as Jane nodded numbly, her gaze still transfixed on Maura. "Alright…uh, cool. What about you, doc?"

If Frost was aware of the situation unfolding before him, he didn't let on as Maura gave him a curt nod and smile.

"Come on, Detective Sexy McBadass," Jane whispered in Maura's ear before grabbing her hand. "Let's go get this shit scared out of us."

"Jane, language!"

* * *

They stood at the entrance of the crude haunted house, listening the screams and 'fear-inducing' music that echoed from inside. Jane's hand was still clasped securely around Maura's and she could feel the M.E. shaking slightly beside her. With facing death almost every day, the detective was more than surprised that her best friend would be reduced to tremors at merely the thought of entering a room full of fake monsters.

"Alright team," Frankie said in a tough voice as he held up his hand like a make-shift gun, "let's go in." He quickly slinked behind the black curtain, followed seconds later by the other stooges that were laughing and playing along.

Jane stole a quick look at the M.E., immediately noticing the worry in her eyes. She was going to suggest not going in, but her words were halted as Maura gave a quick tug to her arm and pulled her inside. Immediately upon entering, the duo was cloaked in darkness, their eyes unable to adjust as shrieks reverberated off the walls around them. The brunette felt Maura press more snuggly against her, each inch of skin burning under her best friend's touch. _I could get used to this._

They'd already lost Frankie, Frost and Korsak and were slowly making their way through the maze of blackness as a group of drunken men rushed up behind them, startling Maura and causing her to squeal loudly. Jane's nerves were rattled for a moment as she lost grip on Maura's hand and she reached blindly around her, hoping to come in contact with the traumatized honey-blonde.

"Jane? Where are you?"

The detective hurriedly followed the shaky voice before grasping onto Maura's arm. She felt her jump beneath her touch before the M.E. once again snuggled closer to her. "It's just a bunch of hocus pocus," Jane joked as she tucked an arm around Maura's waist. "Besides, we haven't even reached the scary part yet."

"Don't remind me," Maura said, her voice quivering almost imperceptibly. "I must admit, I never found haunted houses to be much fun."

"Really? Who knew Dr. Death was afraid of a bunch of morons in Halloween masks."

Maura ignored the remark as they continued ahead, only to enter a room full of strobe lights and screeching 'dead' people. Having seen plenty of blood and gore in her lifetime, the honey-blonde tried not to laugh at the scene portrayed before her, as a man with a rather large scalpel cut into a screaming redhead. "I do believe they went a bit overboard in here. Don't you?"

"What do you mean?" Jane questioned with a smirk. "He looks kind of like you do when you perform an autopsy."

Maura playfully swatted the detective's arm as they continued to walk forward, her nerves lessening with each step, but her grip on Jane never loosening. Her adrenaline was still rushing and she could no longer be certain if it was due to the haunted house or her rather close proximity to her best friend. Jane's hand had found its way to Maura's leather-clad hip, her fingertips sinking softly into the M.E.'s porcelain skin by their own volition. It heightened all of Maura's senses, making her head spin lightly as she felt Jane's nails dig into her sensitive flesh after a scream echoed nearby.

The detective heard Maura hiss, immediately realizing that perhaps she was gripping the shorter woman a little too forcefully. "Sorry, Maur," she whispered, her breath ghosting over the honey-blonde's ear as she leaned closer. "Got a little startled for a moment."

"No, Jane. Don't let go." Feeling Jane's grasp loosen caused Maura to speak up, not wanting to lose the contact they had as they entered another darkened room. Once again, the M.E.'s heartbeat began to race; and once again, she couldn't be sure if it was due to the Jane or the frightening situation they found themselves in.

"I won't let go," she promised, instinctively tightening her grip on Maura, her hand coming to rest on the M.E.'s hip as her fingertips began to trace small circles on the skin underneath them.

The honey-blonde's breath hitched momentarily before ultimately beginning to quicken. Jane had no idea what she could do to Maura with just a simple touch and the M.E. immediately felt the heat that rushed between her legs. She tried to contain the whimper that was building in her throat as Jane's index finger slipped beneath the waistband of her leather skirt, but it was to no avail.

"Jane…" The brunette's name left her lips in a groan.

Contrary to popular belief, the detective knew exactly what her gratuitous touches did to Maura. She noticed it every time their fingers would graze, every time she'd put her hand on the small of Maura's back, every time she wrapped her best friend in a hug. She knew.

"Maura," she murmured before turning so that they were face to face in the darkness. Screams still echoed all around them as haunting music continued to play, but Jane didn't notice any of it. She couldn't comprehend anything beyond the air they were sharing and the breath that left Maura's mouth before being sucked into her own. "I'm going to kiss you now."

"Please."

And with that final whimper from Maura, their lips connected with a ferocity neither of them knew they possessed. Jane's arms snaked around the shorter woman's waist as she urged their bodies closer together, her tongue teasing Maura's lips as she begged for entrance—which she was quickly granted.

It was a clashing of tongues and teeth and Jane could've sworn that her entire body was on fire, rapidly being consumed by Maura Isles. The flames scorched her from the inside out and she let out a moan of appreciation as she felt herself being pushed backwards, stumbling through the blackness and the sea of people around them before her back was flush with the wall behind her.

Maura could barely think, all of her thoughts dissipating as she continued to devour the woman in front of her. She sucked in a deep breath as their lips finally parted, gasping for air before dipping her head to nip and lick along Jane's jawline.

"Oh my God," Jane keened as Maura's mouth came in contact with her pulse point. Of all the scenarios she'd imagined, never once did she think that _this_ is where they'd share their first kiss; surrounded by people in masks while secluded in darkness.

"Most people just call me Maura."

Part of Jane wanted to tease back and ask if the M.E. had just made a joke, but she couldn't bring herself to form the words as she felt a hand slide beneath the waistband of her pants before dipping into her already dripping core. _Jesus Christ. We're going to do this. Right here. Right now._

"Jane," Maura moaned, feeling the detective's wetness on her fingertips. "Tell me this is okay. Tell me that this isn't wrong." Despite her previous convictions that they both wanted this, Maura needed to hear it. She needed to know that she wasn't the only one that had dreamt of this, that she wasn't the only one that had spent many nights pleasuring herself as she'd fantasized about what the two of them together would be like.

"No, this isn't wrong. And if it is, I certainly don't want to be right," Jane whimpered as she felt Maura's palm brush over her aching clit.

And that was all the permission Maura needed before she plunged two fingers inside of her best friend, pressing her body closer to Jane's, needing as much contact as possible. Her breathing was heavy and she could feel the sweat already accumulating on her skin from the exertion behind her thrusts.

Being this close to Jane, being inside of Jane, it was overwhelming. Feeling the detective's velvet walls clasping around her fingers was irresistible and Maura couldn't stop now if she wanted to. Already, it was an addiction. Jane was an addiction.

"Ah, God," the brunette sobbed, her cries undetectable to anyone but Maura as shrieks continued to resonate around them. "Fuck. Don't… oh… don't stop."

Jane could feel herself slowly coming undone as Maura's fingers continued to pump inside of her, the palm of her hand occasionally rubbing over her clit, causing more groans and whimpers to escape her lips.

Maura sighed when she felt Jane's thigh move between her legs, allowing her to relieve the ache that seemed to bloom from within her. She sunk her teeth into the skin on Jane's shoulder, knowing how close she herself already was to release, before soothing the detective's flesh with her tongue.

"Come for me, Jane," the honey-blonde whispered before greedily claiming Jane's lips in another bruising kiss.

With one final thrust of Maura's fingers inside of her and one final flick of Maura's thumb over her clit, Jane felt herself falling over the edge. She dropped her head to the honey-blonde's shoulder as she screamed out Maura's name.

Maura continued to move her fingers inside of Jane slowly, bringing her down from her high. She steadied herself, trying to get her legs situated underneath her as she took the brunt of most of the detective's weight. She placed soft kisses in chocolate brown hair as she ran her fingers through messy curls.

"Jesus," Jane said, letting out a breathy sigh as she felt Maura's fingers leave her. It took a few moments for her to catch her bearings before she leaned back against the wall, pulling her best friend with her, bringing their bodies flush together once again. "Dear God…"

"If you're going to continue praising God, perhaps you should consider attending church with your mother on Sunday," the M.E. laughed as she buried her face in Jane's neck, placing delicate kisses on olive-toned skin.

Instead of responding, Jane simply shook her head and slid her hands down Maura's arms before intertwining their finger. "You do realize we just had sex in a haunted house with at least a dozen people around us?"

"Yes, I do realize this," Maura stated simply before tipping her head and nipping at Jane's earlobe. "And while it was magnificent, I think I'd like to get you back to my house, in my bed… where I can better hear you screaming my name."

"Don't go getting a big head there, Maur. Before the night is over, I can assure you, you're the one that will be doing most of the screaming."

The End

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_**There you have it, my loves. Leave me a little review and let me know what you thought of my first foray into the wonderful land of Rizzles!**_


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